….and I knew it. It hit a deep wound. And I knew it. I responded, even though I knew exactly what was going on. I couldn’t help myself.
I have a new soft shell (I’m a Cancer) that I have recently grown. I’m vulnerable – hell, we all are – when we are trying on something new and stepping into who we are. It takes a SHIT TON of courage to do this work. I’m not just speaking for myself, I’m saying this for all of us!
And, I know anytime that we choose to put our authentic selves out there that it’s risky. We open ourselves up to criticism, and we know it’s coming, but we do it anyway. BECAUSE WE HAVE TO.
I can’t speak for others, but, I think I can give a voice to artists…at least those who are going outside of their comfort zone, and being authentic to who they are, and painting what their soul is begging them to paint.
As an artist, what we paint – for the most part – is who we are. It’s our emotional being on canvas. It’s our soul expressing itself. It’s very difficult to separate who we are from what we do. I think that most artists feel this way.
I have a pretty tough shell when it comes to constructive criticism….like – you need more darks, more contrast, the composition is a bit wonky, etc etc. I actually welcome CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. I always open to learning. As most of us are.
But I am not open to this: “This painting is awful. It looks like Dolly Parton on a bad hair day on drugs.”
And then he went on to compare me to James Bama, who is a great, VERY traditional artist, and does not paint in my style at all. He paints the seen. I paint the unseen. The visions, the messages.
There is no comparing.
He couldn’t paint what I paint…but, I can still paint traditionally.
I responded and first of all said – “Thank God, not all of us like the same art. And I’m grateful that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”
And then, a reaction, “Didn’t your mother teach you if you couldn’t say anything nice, then say nothing at all?”
He continued….with a lot more condescending rhetoric….that pushed every single button, all my wounding, all my doubts and fears.
Delete and ban.
I’m not sharing this with you for you to get on the “f*** him” bandwagon.
I’m sharing it, because we can choose to allow it to affect us, or we can delete and ban. It happens to all of us who are stepping up and into who we are. Our intuition is strong. Our desire to be ourselves is strong. Our passion about our paths is even stronger.
I don’t know this man…but, I suspect that he is unhappy. And that is not my problem. I can choose to let him affect me (and, I have got to admit – it did – a bit more than a bit), or I can know that I am just not gonna be everyone’s cup of tea.
Still learning those never ending lessons….as you know….they keep circling around (and give me GREAT blog fodder!!)
May we walk together as one
PS…I’ll bet he hates Georgia and Jackson too…#just sayin