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Mea Culpa

I KNEW I published my HUGE rant for a reason…. Initially, I had NOT ONE CLUE about why it bothered me so much. Ninety nine percent of the time, when I get a comment that triggers me, I delete it. This time it sent me on a tear.

First of all, let me give a tad bit of a backstory. I published a post about a date that I had in Taos, and the lesson that the whole interaction provided to me. (Thank you GUS!) If you want to read it, click here.

I received a comment from a (dear) woman…..that just irritated the crap outta me. AND, I went on a blog rant. (Click here for that piece of work!)

She read it, and reached out to me.

She was vulnerable with me. She told me that, in all likelihood she did not read my post thoroughly. She apologized. It was sincere. I was still in a bit of a snit, and told her apology accepted, and I sent her blessings.

That night, I had time to meditate on it.

So many of us post about not judging people. About walking a mile in their shoes. About how people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

I judged her. And yet, I get very pissy when I am judged….

The next day, I sent her this:

“‘I’ve had time to meditate, and reflect on our interaction. I would NOT be walking my talk if I did not share this with you. I know that I am totally guilty of not reaching out to you after you made the comment that you did. I should have asked you what you meant, rather than being triggered. I appreciate you explaining yourself more than you know. We obviously have a soul contract to teach me a lesson, and I appreciate your graciousness. Blessings to you….thank you again.”

She could have been nasty. She could have ignored me. She could have been abrupt like I was the night before…..

Instead she explained.

She had not read my blog thoroughly. She wanted me to give the man in Taos a chance. Mostly because she has friends that are married to non-spiritual men, and they are very content. She wanted my happiness…


We went on to chit chat about triggers, etc.

Again, I thanked her for providing me with a very valuable lesson.

Everything unfolded exactly as it was supposed to. We fulfilled a soul contract with one another.

It proved to me once again, how interconnected we all are.

Thank you dear woman for helping me along this journey.

Next time you think you know what someone’s motivation is, and it triggers you, ask questions. Dig…reach out.

I’m so grateful that I did.

May We Walk Together As One.


Added bonus…she also helped me get SUPER clear that I will not settle for anything less than I desire…

Big, no, HUGE Rant Post…

Yesterday I posted something that was super hard for me to share. It was very vulnerable, and very much about my process and my lessons. And, believe it or not, I received a comment from someone who doesn’t know me at all, and who obviously did not read my post, chastising me….

Here is the link to yesterday’s post.

This is one of the chastising comments (I actually received TWO!!!).

“Sometimes “non-spiritual” guys accept you for who you are and are fine with you being on your path, whatever that may be. Why judge him before getting to know him first, if you found something about him attractive? Maybe there are other ways to find commonality. Maybe he finds his kind of spirituality in nature, or in a good book, or in eating great food. Sometimes, spiritual guys are assholes also. Just saying. Maybe look at your own judgements here. Then again, maybe it was just meant to be a fleeting moment.”


Seriously, did she even READ my blog? If my soul, my journey, my path did not want me to grow in the ways that I am being asked, I, honestly, would have stayed married to my former husband. He was a very good man, just not on a spiritual path.

Look at my own judgement? I KNOW what my path entails….and requires….It is to be with someone spiritual. There is something that I know that I am to do with a spiritual man. Will I settle? NO!!!! I’m happy being alone. Yes, I am so very aware that “non-spiritual” guys will accept me for who I am, and it is NOT judgement to make an observation that someone is not on a spiritual path. It’s no different than a woman saying that she wants a Christian man. My life. My decision.

Plus, if she had actually READ MY BLOG, perhaps she would have read that I made an attempt to get to know him, and all I received was crickets. Kinda hard to get to know someone, when they don’t want to be known.

My post was about my process. It wasn’t about judgement.

I know that I am not perfect….It’s called progress, NOT PERFECTION.

My close friends know that if they see me getting off track, they have my permission to pull out a 2 x 4 and use it if I need it.

So…this is my HUGE rant post. Don’t make frickin judgement comments when you obviously do NOT know my path, and, furthermore, have NOT read my post.

End Rant


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About Paula
Raven Shaman