….my paintings. Yup….there it is. Out in the open finally. I get a new one finished and I put it in my bedroom. Kind of like what I used to do when I got a new pair of shoes, or new clothes. I sleep with them so that I can look at them, meditate with them…give them good peaceful energy. I sleep with them so that I can meditate with it to see what I can learn ….about my technique, hell….I do it so that I can learn about me!
I wake up in the middle of the night – frequently – and ponder…”It it finished? What is the message? Do I show growth and change?”
This past “creation” ….for me….shows quite a bit of change as far as where I am on my journey. As I lay in bed with my painting (I know…right?), I studied it along with where my head and my heart were when it was being created. I started in the morning with my “typical” colors – all warm colors – root chakra colors. I had had a phone call from a “friend” who had told me many things that were “wrong” with me – prefacing it with “Now…I want you to know, I’m not judging you.” Okay…then why even bring it up. And it did what that sort of conversation normally does for me. I spiraled. I went into “nobody likes me”, worm-eating phase.
And then, I left the house. I drove… This area is gorgeous – all hills (they call them mountains, but I’m not quite there yet!), and trees, and lakes and rivers. And it’s spring – which means forsythia, dogwoods, redbuds, daffodils and GREEN…lots of green. And I drove by a house that I was curious about – on a bluff overlooking the White River – all greens, and blues…
I came home – and painted – and went to another world – and painted in higher chakra colors. What difference did it make what that “friend” of mine thought about me? Seriously. I’m here to be me… Not someone else.. Just unique me.
And so – I sleep with my paintings – because creation amazes me. I sleep with my paintings, much as I used to go in and gaze at my children while they were sleeping. Creation – from me. My creation. Wow.
I think that makes me pretty cool – maybe not the sleeping with the paintings part – but, being amazed at the creative process – ALWAYS – I think makes me pretty dang cool.
And anyway – I HATE worms.