I am NOT a Love Avoider…

Walk Barefoot
Walk Barefoot

….nor am I an ultra-feminist, or a narcissist…..BUT, I am a Highly Sensitive Empath….

Once again, a very vulnerable post – yet, I feel the need to share.

The backstory…because it’s a doozy, and I think that many of you can relate.

I choose to go to a therapist a year and a half ago.  She was recommended to me as highly spiritual who could help me on a much deeper level, which is what I wanted.  I desired to work with someone who understood spiritual principle, as well as how to function in today’s world with all of the energies that bombard us as spiritual beings having a human experience.

I was ready to get down to MY nitty gritty.  AND, ultimately, I did….but, on my own, although the therapist played a huge part, just not in the way that she intended, which is frequently the case.

She labeled me.  First, I was a love avoider.  Then, I found out she told the man that I was dating that I was a narcissist and ultra-feminist.

I spiraled.  It was a slippery slope downhill.

After all, as a child I was taught to respect the opinion and not question authority figures.  After all, they had training in that field, and I didn’t.

But, was that MY truth?

Or the therapist’s truth?

I got angry. (After the downhill spiral where I was sure I was a total failure in life and would never amount to anything – so why even try?)  VERY angry.  I went to her for help, and all she did was label me, sweep me under the rug, and tell the man that I was dating why he shouldn’t be with me.

She never took the time with me to work on the reason why I came to her.  Which were intimacy issues.

So, I started doing my own research.  I found another therapist, and worked with a brilliant human who specifically works with Empaths.  I came across Dr. Judith Orloff….It’s like she knew me.  Everything about me.  My need for solitude, quiet and alone time.  Why I couldn’t sleep with someone else.  Why I felt like I was crazy.  The importance of boundaries…(Which was also what my brilliant human – Brooke Tatum – had told me for years!!)

Turns out MY truth, was not the therapists truth.  I didn’t question…until I did.  Nothing about what she said about me felt true – and I came across a phenomenal article in Elephant Journal while doing my research, after taking a plethora of online quizzes to see whether or not I was a narcissist (all results – no matter how often I took them – was a resounding NO!), that spoke to me, and probably to many.   It was about whether or not an Empath can be a narcissist……DEFINITELY NOOOOOO!!!

My truth.

Not the therapists.

Not the man I was dating.

MY TRUTH.

Had I not questioned her authority, I would still be down that deep dark rabbit hole, wondering if I am a horrid human, with no redeeming qualities.

And, so peeps….I want to remind you….seek YOUR truth.  If something doesn’t feel right to you…make it your mission to find YOUR answers.

I did.

I’m much happier than I ever have been.

There is always room for growth. Just sayin’.

May we walk together as one.

 

Blessings,

Paula

 

 

 

6 Responses to I am NOT a Love Avoider…

  1. You, Paula, are one of the most amazing women I have had the pleasure to know. I’m glad you didn’t let that therapist diminish your value! I love you!

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