Boundaries seem to be my lesson lately. After years of not even knowing what they were, and then being aware – but not sure how to make them, and now – being aware of how to make them – they seem to be presenting opportunities right and left to see if I am able to make AND enforce them.
I posted a meme yesterday about the Perseids – my FAVORITE meteor shower ever – I even built a gazebo in my backyard in Taos that I could sleep in during the shower – so that I wouldn’t miss out. Something very magical about this particular shower.
Since I have moved to Arkansas, I don’t get to watch it as much, because – TREES – lots and lots of trees. And light. And humid air.
Imagine my excitement when I realized that I am going to be in Monument Valley during the Perseids!!!!! So excited to be where nothing blocks the sky, there are no lights, AND NO HUMIDITY!!!
And then, it came.
Someone who is not even a friend felt the need to inform me of this: “Sorry, but The description in this meme is grossly misleading. Most people will see, at most, 2 meteors per minute…and that is if you live in an area far away from any city. Live in a small town, maybe one every couple if minutes, and in a city, maybe a couple for the whole shower. Street lights will easily overpower meteors, except for the very brightest. Also, this meteor shower happens EVERY year. Meteors are cool, but don’t have unrealistic expectations. And sorry, but the third quarter moon will likely make dark sky sights less than ideal.”
Three months ago I would have just deleted his post. However, once one starts learning boundaries, one is very hyper aware of them, and tends to go a tad overboard setting them. #justsayin
So, I responded with this: “I don’t have unrealistic expectations. I’ve lived in Taos and watched….please don’t rain on my parade. I watch every year. I don’t understand why people feel the need to say stuff when someone is excited about something. Also, (Insert name), your profile pic is Make America Kind Again. What is kind about raining on someone’s parade who is genuinely excited. #andwhyareyouevenonmypage
Him: “The meme presents unrealistic expectations. Which would let down people who think they are going to see the show of a lifetime.”
(Insert a WTF from me at this point!)
Me: “No…it doesn’t. Everyone’s truth is their truth. My truth is that I am and was excited. You pissed on my excitement. Even if it isn’t as spectacular as stated, it would have been, and still will be spectacular to me. Why did you feel the need, especially since you aren’t even a friend, to say this?”
And then this.
Him: “Be excited. I like meteors, but if you spread this meme, it is your duty to represent the truth.”
OMG…..really? I have to check every meme I post?
Me: “If I share this meme it is no concern of yours. Make up your own. You aren’t a friend. I don’t even know how you found this on my page. And NO it’s not my duty. It is my RIGHT to share what I want, and to be excited.”
Why – does someone who doesn’t even know me – feel the need – the desire – to correct someone THEY DON’T EVEN KNOW?
If he truly wants America to be Kind Again – shouldn’t HE practice what he preaches?
Boundaries – big time.
I’m sure that I will loosen my standards for my boundary making in the future, and just delete something like that.
However, right now, for me, I’m over-the-top-aware.
So, for those of you who love the Perseids as much as I do – have the most delightful time watching them. And for those of you who want to rain on someone else’s parade – take that shit elsewhere.
May we walk together as one.